Apple Festival 2019

With our favorite: Honeycrisp apple slushies!

Our Lady of Guadalupe in Clemson

Went to this Mexican Restaurant in Clemson, and I got a kick out of the Clemson Tiger Paw incorporated into the image.

Annie's First Day of School 2019 - 2020 : 7th Grade

... aaaannnnnnddddd in case you were wondering how she REALLY feels about taking this picture:

The Kissing Hand 2019

I realized today that I had never taken a picture of reading this book. (My sweet pre-teen Annie at least let me read it while she was getting her bookbag ready this year.) This was such a special gift from Leia's Godparents (Natalie & Greg) when Leia started school. It is a book about Chester the Racoon who is afraid to go to school until his mom gives him the "kissing hand," which is a kiss he saves in the palm of his hand. The book comes with stickers, and both girls have gotten one on the first day of school from preschool on. In the early days, they kept it on the back of their hand after I gave them a kissing hand from ME. Now they keep it on a keychain or a zipper pull, BUT I still read the book the night before the first day of school, and I will continue to, until the girls go to college. After the first day, I try to remember to retrieve them and stick them back on the book, no matter what condition they're in. One of them was on a booking for the entire year! This is the one for Annie's 7th grade year, on a Keychain. 

Symbol at Daily Mass

This post requires some explanation. Long ago (2012) both Shana & I shared a spiritual vision that changed our lives:  it made me more progressive and it made Shana more Catholic. For brevity purposes, I will keep it simple. Shana saw the more spiritual part of the vision: the Communion of Saints in Heaven, a pyramid of sorts (or top of a tree) with levels, Christ as a pulsing white light at the top. I saw the more earthly part of the vision: mine was kind of like the roots of the tree branching off in both directions showing the duality of absolutely everything on this earth (in which each thing, feeling, living being, EVERYTHING could be used for good or for evil). 

Our vision was accompanied by a symbol: basically the Chi Rio (PX, the first two letters of Christ's name in Greek, used by Constantine to win battles in God's name). You see the one on the right also had a horizontal bar (like a cross). Ours was contained in an icthus (the fish, also representing Christ) and had the P incorporated within the resulting triangles. Like this:

Many other letters and important resulting meanings could be seen as well. Then TODAY at Mass, ... and even with the new leadership, I noticed our symbol at the bottom right of the peace plant under the Tabernacle in the Our Lady of the Angels Chapel!

I can't think of a more positive sign to be shown through God's peaceful, botanical creation! I took this as a reminder of the Truth behind our shared vision, ... but as for the "why now?" question, I have NO idea (as I feel nothing but disillusioned by the changes). I just took it as a good sign that God is still in control of His One True Church. I still feel there is further to this, so perhaps I will be shown something more in the future. 

Annie Loving Kumo

Comforting Annie in the Car

Heading home from school, both hungry & tired, is always one of the hardest times for Annie. She needed some snuggles today. Oh how I TREASURE these moments!

A Change of Leadership at Church

This month marked the beginning of our biggest faith crisis as a family:  the change from the Franciscan order to a diocesan parish (from a progressive parish led by a particular order to ultra conservative one led directly by the bishop).

 I will never forget where I was when I heard the news. I was sitting in the choir and listening to father Martin's homily. He told us that the Franciscans would be heading back to their main Friary in New Jersey and eventually outfitting other parishes in the Northeast. I actually exclaimed, "OH NO!" really loudly through the microphone.  I remember at the very last Franciscan Mass, the current Leader of the order said multiple times, "Remember that this is still YOUR parish." I hoped that was true. It was not.

 Over the years I have served God through 7 different ministries: lector, altar server, Eucharistic Minister, choir member, musician, head of the Student Prayer Request Ministry. I had planned to continue in all of these ministries for the rest of my life.

This change in leadership of the church began the deletion of ALL of these ministries.  

Even the parish council was immediately dissolved, with the explanation that the new pastor would be making all of the final decisions and guided by a few hand selected people.

The change of leadership was like going back before Vatican II to a more Benedictine and ultra-conservative parish.

Probably the biggest change was that women were no longer welcome near the altar or in the sacristy.  I considered this a direct affront to Pope Francis's recent change in Canon Law that women could take a larger leadership role in the Church.

 Almost every single day there was another change. It began on the 2nd day of the new pastor when he processed in and said, "Let's try something new." And I thought, "Here we go."  The 1st change was to take all singing out of the daily Mass. Here is a list of the changes, most in order:

*No singing at daily mass. 

*Daily masses only A few days a week. 

*All mass times were changed. 

*Fired the Church Office Admin (only to rehire her when a suitable replacement couldn't be found.)

*No Spanish-speaking priest (*would change)

*No Spanish Mass (*would change)

*Referring to the priest by their last name. 

*No more Brown Franciscan robes. Now it is a black cassic now it is a black cassock with 33 buttons that represent buttons that represented each year of Christ's life. 

*No sacristans at daily mass. 

*No sacristans at Sunday mass.  

*No one other than the priest allowed to touch the tabernacle. 

*Change from very simple "cup of a carpenter" chalice to incredibly ornate, diamond-encrusted chalices. 

*The deletion of the beautiful apostle chalice with red stones because of scratches in the bottom. 

*The change from Three Kings Incense which contained  Is frankensense and myrrh to a 100% frankenstein's ground themselves with a mortar and pestile. 

*The switch from the more energy efficient oil candles back to all wax candles all wax candles because they "give their lives" until death. 

*Two candles with gold bases on either side of the priest lectern only (not the parisioner lectern)

*The switch of the baptismal candle from oil to wax as well. 

*The demand that both sacristy doors remain locked at all times. 

*Prayer before procession. 

*Incense at almost every Mass. 

*Purchase of a new gold censor. 

*Removal of the old parish council. 

*Hand chosen few for a new parish council. *Police called for homeless warming themselves near the door.  

*The removal of all Franciscan feasts from the liturgical calendar.

*Music director fired. 

*No more choir. 

*Most songs in Latin.  

*The banning of the song "All Are Welcome."

*Priest says the our father in Latin while we say it in English. 

*No holding hands during the hour father.

*No peace time. 

*The change from 2 simple candles on the altar to 6 candles with ornate, cathedral bases on the altar.

*A golden crucifix in the middle of the altar, facing the priest. 

*The change of the orientation of the priest chair from toward the congregation to toward the altar itself. 

*The removal of the banners the banners beside the large crucifix showing the in the Liturgical season. 

*Extra rug near the altar. 

*Change of altar service to all boys. 

*Altar servers accompanying priest with "plate" under each Eucharist.

*Change of altar server garments from very plain white garments to very fancy lace garments over black ones. 

*Priest only giving out communion. 

*Veiled chalice. 

*Very fancy vestments ornamented with gold. *Removal of all Franciscan crosses: The San Damiano crucifix. 

*No more bringing up of the gifts. 

*The priest personally choosing all altar servers. 

*No more girl altar servers. 

*Change in altar server positions instead of sitting facing the congregation, kneeling on the marble steps toward the tabernacle.  

*The priest only drinking the Blood of Christ, never offered to parishioners.

*The ringing of Bells During consecration.

*The ringing g of bells at other times.

*New Benedictine Monstance for Adoration. 

*New Benedictine candelabras (5 candles each?) beside the Tabernacle.

*Law enforcement used to remove homeless people. 

*Pastor hobnobbing with new young female, controlling principal of school in her office constantly.

*Lost former principal.

*Lost all but one of the previous teachers. 

*At least 3 teachers quit right in the middle of the school year.

*No priests frequenting school.

*No Kindergarten or Preschool at Mass.

*No prayer request box brought up to altar

*School chapel turned into "health room."

*All students out of uniform MUST wear a dress to Mass.

*Announcement of only Catholics in the state of grace could receive communion. Anyone else anyone else could only receive a blessing. (This was indirect contradiction of the Franciscan idea that we are not the watchdogs of the church.) 

*Negation of the  Lutheran covenant that was designed by Pope Francis to promote unity. *The cancelation of the unified Vacation Bible School for small children 

*The creation of Totus Tuus Bible school, at our own church meant to instill Catholic doctrine only.

Another big difference in feeling was the change from an order who took a vow of poverty to diocesan priests who did not, and drove fancy cars and used golden chalices that were their own. I wish I had a picture of Franciscan Father Martin's chalice. It was very plain. Very plain. It was simple silver with the Francesca Tau Cross and hands of  Francis and Christ. That is it. Below this written post are pictures of of one of the new younger parish priest's chalice. Note the 1 carat diamond and 2 other half carat diamonds in it. Gold, platinum, and silver. No one was allowed to touch it. It was also never to be used except on a special occasion. Wouldn't one want the Blood of Christ to touch it as much as possible?

One of the scariest things that happened was 1 of the new younger priests gave a homily on the title of "Father," used after God the Father in heaven. He said, "And just like God the Father in Heaven disciplines His children, he would be disciplining us." Annie leaned over to me at that moment and said, "Do you see why I am terrified of these priests?"

The most disturbing story about these changes came from the treatment of the homeless. During the winter in the North Carolina mountains, it would get very cold. Many homeless people would either take refuge in the church by going to Mass, in the entry way to get warm, or if the church was locked then sitting outside one of the glass doors that would provide a little bit of warmth. One of the last days that I was sacristan, I was in the sacristy setting up when the younger of the new priests came huffing into the sacristy obviously very angry and frustrated. His 1st sentence to me was, "What did these Franciscans do about these homeless people who sleep by the door at night to get warm!?! This is a church, this isn't a community center!" My mouth absolutely dropped open. And I said, "The Franciscan instruction was that as long as they weren't bothering the other parishioners, causing harm in any way or stealing, they were allowed just like anyone else." The priest replied that these were professional homeless and they shouldn't be here. I immediately felt the Holy Spirit calling to me that I had to say something, and I had to say something to a Catholic priest. To a Catholic priest! My words were as follows: "Father, if I remember correctly, Jesus often reprimanded the pharisees and drove the money changers out of the temple, but never EVER did He ban homeless or the poor." The priest, still frustrated, repeated "This is a Church not a community center."

None of us feel at home in this parish any longer. 

... And I worry that both of my children will lose their Faith as a result of the fear created by these conservative changes.